6 Types of Pedestrians You See on Any Cairo Street
4 months ago
If you’ve got a car in Cairo, chances are you’ve fantasized about running over some annoying pedestrians. Sure, you wouldn’t actually do it, but never say never, right? Just pray that you won’t come in contact with these infamous characters:
1. The Bizarro Pedestrian
Just like Bizarro Superman, who intentionally does everything backwards and opposite anyone else, this type of pedestrian likes to cross against the traffic light every single time. They need to pass when the light for cars is green, and they refuse to wait even 20 seconds until that light turns red. They will jump in front of any car and they will risk their lives for those 20 seconds without hesitations… why? No one knows. Maybe they’re adrenaline junkies.
2. The Businessman
Whether or not you wanted this pedestrian to pass in front of your car, their routine is the same every time: they glance at you for a good three seconds for some reason, then they proceed to walk at the slowest pace possible while talking on the phone. You could be on Salah Salem Street and cars could be whizzing in every direction, but this man just has to take this call.
3. The Cheesy Couple
Apparently, for a lot of Egyptian couples, crossing the street is a way to spend time. Maybe there are entire dates that just consist of crossing the street over and over again. They seem to really enjoy it, because they always cross the street extra slowly, holding hands and laughing. They occasionally make eye contact with drivers as a way of flaunting their eternal love in people’s faces.
4. The Gossiping Hens
Usually, these are two to four girls with their arms intertwined, and they’re always giggling and whispering excitedly. They cross the street slowly, and they always seem to perceive cars as transformers, which is why they gasp and grab each other when they see you approaching. When you let them know that they can pass, they stop and look at you in utter astonishment. Nobody is sure why.
5. The Catcaller
There are only a handful of times when a woman might actually commit murder, and one of those times is when she allows a male pedestrian to pass, and he stops and catcalls her. It should be perfectly legal to run over those types of pedestrians at least twice.
6. The Suicidal Family
First mentioned by George Azmy, the suicidal family is one of those landmarks that give Egypt its charm. We’re never sure why an entire family wants to commit suicide simultaneously by jumping in front of a car, but we sure as hell don’t want to take responsibility for it. Stay away from those sidewalks and beware!